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Love Keeps Kicking

by Martha

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The phone was ringing for an hour or so, When I heard your voice, in Tokyo, say, “Promise you won’t do this anymore”, You’ve always given sound advice, And tried not to catastrophise, Honestly I couldn’t face the thought, Of that familiar feeling, When your heart is healing, Theodore, I just keep on running from it all, I think I’ll work from home today, Feel like quitting anyway, Give me nothing ventured, nothing gained, This year blew my world apart, Admin with a broken heart, Last orders at a Kōenji station bar, It takes a lifetime to begin to forget, I don’t think I’m ready, I don’t think I’m ready, So painful to be back at the start, The stillness of a lonely healing heart.
A moment of hesitation, Another minute staring at a screen, Like a painter that blushes at bodies, embarrassed, I don't want to be seen, I’ll just pick at some blue-tac, I may as well start with something small, But I’ve got a feeling that I’ll just be leaving that poster on my wall A photograph is like an hourglass sometimes, I was confused and in a daze when I found you, Oh my god you're a sight for sore eyes, Some ironic pseudonym, Nothing left could save me, I was ready to give in, Oh my god you're a sight for sore eyes, Weathered, weary, brittle, blue, Light broke through the clouds, When I saw that it was really, truly you You try to extinguish the heartache, I told you that I rarely go outside, Isabelle Eberhardt wouldn't know where to start, I’ll just float out with the tide, When a month is a minute, We never have the time to say farewell, Is this what it means when you love and you leave, And the grief kicks in again A photograph is like an hourglass sometimes I was confused and in a daze when I left you Life goes on, I still see you in the images and stories That still clutter every empty space Upon these walls, inside my head, I’ll keep breathing till I'm out of breath. I wonder if you'll hear me cry for help A photograph is all I got till you get back
Into This 03:11
I can’t ever tell what I have with you, Like when I found you playing my guitar in my bedroom, You were sat on my bed, when you asked me to come over, But you gave me a look that you wouldn’t give me if you were sober, My heart flutters then it sinks, Cause you only want to kiss me when you’ve had a drink. Are you into this? I’m happy being friends if that’s what we’re gonna be, Sometimes we seem close but then you’ll act like you’ve never met me, It’s almost painful how the Buckie’s brought out the red in your lips, I’ll brush the hair out of your face, but that’s as far as I can take this.
I used to sort of be ashamed to be myself, I used to sort of try and hide and try and act like someone else, I used to sit alone and cry sometimes and curse my own reflection, how sad, Hearing laughter through the walls, it can’t all be that bad, They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, When we first met it felt like we’d been friends for so much longer. You were hanging at the snooker club and you were acting kind of hyper, You said you’d met the ghosts of Maya Angelou and Rowdy Roddy Piper, It’s like a cloud was hanging over me until the day we texted for the first time, And the world just got a little brighter.
Mini lit a match as he boarded the train, He knew he shouldn’t go but he couldn’t remain, With four white walls and a tortured brain, Stared into the flicker of a tiny flame, Mini was a rebel and a tearaway, He wouldn’t say his prayers and he wouldn’t behave, He could sing a song, he could write a play, But they gave him the belt and said he’d never be saved, Something dies everyday, something precious died when he got locked away, Funny and intelligent, charming and so eloquent, Mini caught the train, Oh mini oh, oh mini oh, You made it to the city, Mini was a preteen arsonist, He stole firelighters and a bag of crisps, So they took him to church, yeah they put him on a list, But he wouldn’t back down and he wouldn’t desist, Oh mini, You never asked for much, Something hot enough to touch, I hate the devil for the tricks he played on me, I won’t believe in something I have never seen, It’s such a shame, He just likes the flame.
Things got weird the night you burned the hair to seal the hex, I need a paid interpreter to decipher your midnight texts, You were tripping fractals from the pills you took with Paul, Sometimes I feel so empty I just want to leave it all. “Love keeps kicking” Dressed for the reception, you were coping with the blues, When you got smashed and tried to mosh to Huey Lewis and the News, When granny took a tumble, you were exiled to the crown, You played the one-armed bandit till the landlord chucked you out. You said “love keeps kicking the shit out of me, And there’s no solution I can see, no happy pill, no drinking bleach, No permanent lobotomy, Oh, I tried living, I tried giving, I tried fibbing, I tried kidding, I tried wishing, I tried switching, I tried sitting, I tried drifting, I tried quitting, I tried splitting, I tried shifting, I tried fitting, I tried committing, tried resisting, tried insisting, you’re not listening, Love keeps kicking”  
Kathy I love this kid, Runs so much faster than I ever did, Crossed the globe and started as an intern, At an indie label in a downturn, Folded over the corner of the page, Lit the spark and stormed the stage, Left your friends in Fortitude Valley, Joined a band and nailed the finale, My heart was in arrhythmia when I saw you, Standing silhouetted on Maple Avenue, I felt trouble brewing, I felt the planet shake, But I went along anyway, In the hazy orange light, Underneath the viaduct that night, I had to change my tune to spare my blushes, If this were a movie and this was the start, Would it be a cliché part? Cause I am far too old for foolish crushes. So come and visit for the weekend, Brutalism by the river with a new friend, No secrets, no shame, Falling in love is a dangerous game to play.
Orange Juice 04:09
We were waiting for the movie to start, Asking pub quiz questions in the cinema bar, And I didn’t know it then, but that was all I’d ever wanted, It’s the natural progression of time, And I’m embarrassed to admit I never ordered the wine, But I thought I’d have a chance to make amends, We were driving to Vauxhall and I, You were staring out the window at the world going by, And I didn’t know it then, but you were falling out of love with me, It’s a new development in the plan, A painful change of circumstance, And my heart couldn’t cope with such adversity, I diluted you, like ice in orange juice, I don’t know what to do now. My hand was shaking as I opened the door, To the house where you don’t live anymore, And I didn’t turn the lights on, cause I couldn’t bear to see, It’s the natural progression of time, Like coastal erosion, or the bend in my spine, I lay there with your shadow next to me.
The Void 03:12
I spent my whole life running, From a darkness I can’t comprehend, A gate fell open and summoned, Evil, aeons old and kept in, Non-Euclidean geometry, Something wicked came to swallow me, All our rituals went wrong, We waited for something to labour for, All a séance and a song. We tried to forget it, It’s futile now we regret it, This nameless, faceless, iridescent thing, is closing in, Something icy cold from stories told, Something sinful seared my gentle soul, I saw the dormant perspective; I saw the mirror reflective, I saw the devil, saw the demon, saw the void behind your eyes.
Baby, there was nowhere you could run, nothing you could do, She knew better, sold your old sweater, Lucy shone a light on you, Lucy’s ex had a facial scar in the shape of a crescent moon, And he’d sit on his own on a stool by the bar and waste away his afternoon, When her career finally got in gear and the money started rolling in, Lucy knew the time was due for him to hassle her again, You gotta hand it to him this time, Always thinking bout the pound signs, Digging for another goldmine, Lucy sighed and threw her buzzing phone onto the bed, Just like clockwork he was back and interfering with her head, Haunting her with compliments, acting like nothing’s changed, But she’d hung new posters on her walls, and now the dog don’t remember his name, She handed him a story called ‘The Void Behind Your Eyes’, “I need another point of view, call me when you’ve read this through”. He was a mediocre fella and she was sitting on a hit sci-fi bestseller, A terrible tale of cosmic dread, worse than the darkest thoughts inside his head, He was a coward, he was selfish, cheap and mean, When he read the words inside, something deep within him died, Yeah he glazed over at the eyes, manic laughter filled his mind, “Don’t waste your time, your time on me, cause it’s clear that I’m not your ideal company”
Thinking back to ’59, He held your hand, his valentine, Seduced you with those old love songs, They weren’t his words but he could do no wrong, He said, oh my love, Marry me, let’s not wait, Be mine, for a lifetime, come on its fate, Memories threaded with little beads, On the chain you made for me, With the only letter that you kept, In a wooden box, By where you slept, It was the written proof, it wasn’t fate, He was a waste of time not it’s too late, Holding onto pain and apologies, The final words you said to me, ‘I’m sorry that I made it worse’, Tainted blessing, stubborn curse, Tear stained cheeks, Cold extremities, The bitter sweetness of my shocked capillaries, you said, Take my advice darling, I can attest, Never following it myself, means I know best.


released April 5, 2019

All songs written and performed by Martha
Daniel Ellis, J.Cairns, Naomi Griffin, and Nathan Stephens Griffin


all rights reserved



Martha Durham, UK

Martha is a pop band from Durham city.

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